It All Started With a Lemon
by Spiras Stargate
Summary: McKay's not to happy with John when he returns from his mission with SG1 SLASH


A/N: I first off I don't own Stargate,Stargate SG-1or Stargate Atlantis. I didn't make any money on this and it's just for entertainment.

Secondly I didn't know where to put this, because it's a tag for _**The Pegasus Project**_ but it's more just set for Atlantis. If people disagree on the location please tell me and I'll remove/move it someplace else. I don't have a beta so please excuse all the mistakes and what not. Also I would like to thank someone who will probably never read this, Greg a.k.a Jon, for letting me geek out with him over my weird dreams and Stargate fic ideas.

Last of all please enjoy this. I had fun writting it, and I know my style is a little rough around the edges, so I could use all the suggestions you have to give to help me improve my style.

* * *

John Sheppard looked up from War and Peace as Rodney came through his door and pointed a finger at him angrily.

"You!"

"Me," the colonel nodded to him. "I didn't know you were back yet."

Rodney ignored the comment and stepped farther into John's room, "You gave that to him!"

"Who did I give what to?"

"You gave that crazy sword wielding Mitchell a _lemon_ and he _used_ it on me!"

"He used it-"

"Oh yes! He almost killed me! I think I would have preferred the shooting you kept giving him permission to do!"

John's eyebrows shot up in surprise and confusion, "I was joking!"

"Oh right! And what about you telling him he him could keep me? Would you rather have Carter on your team? Is that it? You know what? You can have her! Or Radek! I think I prefer Russia to this!"

Before John could say another word Rodney had stormed out of his room.

"McKay, wait!" John jump off his bed and had just made it out into the hall when he almost ran into Daniel.

"Colonel Sheppard!" the linguist looked at John in surprise. "I was almost run over by an irate Canadian astrophysicist, who," Daniel paused, glancing at the door to John's room, "just came out of what looks to be your quarters."

"He's a little mad at me…"

Daniel smiled knowingly, "Lovers spat over the briefing we had?"

"No!" John's wide eye stared at the linguist, "McKay and I aren't like that."

"And he was in your room because?"

"He wanted to yell at me!"

"For?"

John frowned, "Look, Dr. Jackson-"

"Daniel…please."

"Daniel…McKay and I aren't…involved."

The blue eyed man looked surprised, "You're not?"

"No," John eyed him, "Who told you we were?"

"I just thought-" Daniel shrugged, "Nevermind."

"Sorry to run like this, but I need to catch up with him and apologize," John started to move around Daniel

"I'd leave him alone," Daniel smiled.

"No offense, but I think I know him better than you do."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that," Daniel half mumbled under his breath before looking up at Sheppard who now was sporting a dumbfounded look. "Give him an hour or two to calm down."

John sighed. He didn't know why but he felt like Daniel knew something that he didn't, "Fine, I'll wait an hour."

"Good. You haven't seen Vala around anywhere have you?"

"You mean you lost her?"

Daniel lowered his head and looked over his glasses, "We'll not exactly. I know she's in the city but where-"

"Talk to Teyla or Ronon. They should be back by now and they'll be able to find her."

"You're not worried?" Daniel was surprised. "I thought Atlantis was your pride and joy?"

"There's not much she can get into without the gene," John focused on Daniel, "She… doesn't have the gene does she?"

"Well no-"

"Then no," John went back toward his room and stepped inside, "But Daniel..."

"Yes?"

"Keep your Colonel away from my scientists, will you?" John shut the door and went back over to his bed and threw himself down on it to wait until an hour had passed.

"Colonel Sheppard," it was Elizabeth.

John's eyes snapped open and he tapped the radio in his ear, "Sheppard."

"Can you come to the briefing room please?"

"On my way."

He sauntered into the room, surprised to see Cameron, Carter, Daniel plus Vala and Rodney all standing around with Elizabeth.

"Sheppard," Daniel nodded to him. "Alright since we're all here Vala has found something interesting while looking through the unexplored parts of the city."

"Unexplored?" John asked, glaring at the dark haired woman who smiled brightly at him.

"It's alright John," Elizabeth said calmingly, "She's found a clue to where Merlin hid the Ancient weapon."

Cameron sighed, "I thought we already had clues."

"But this is different," Daniel held up what appeared to be a videocassette tape.

"She found that? In the unexplored part of the city?" Carter asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes!" Daniel nodded, "Look at the title of it."

Carter took the tape and her eyes widened, "The Sword in the Stone?"

She handed the tape to Cameron who looked up at Elizabeth, "This is some kind of joke right?"

"Daniel," Carter closed her eyes in frustration, "this is a cartoon."

"Yes," he nodded looking proud of himself.

"None of the Ancients were around to make cartoons," Elizabeth looked like she was about to radio Carson to come down and sedate the good doctor so they could find out what alien influence he was under. She seemed to get that look a lot.

Vala smiled, "But we know the Ancients built a time machine."

Daniel nodded, "I think Merlin hide the location of his weapon in this movie. I mean what better place? No one is going to think to look at a children's film for the location to a weapon to destroy higher beings."

"Jackson, this tape is over _10,000_ years old. It's not going to play," Mitchell shook it to prove his point and some pieces of plastic film fell out.

"No but all we need is a copy of the film," Daniel looked to Rodney and gave him a warm flirty smile. "That's why I had Dr. McKay open a worm hole back to Earth and request a copy."

"They should have it ready by the next check in, so we can download it along with all the other reports," McKay smiled back at Daniel in much the same way.

John frowned, "You called me up here to tell me we've resorted to looking for clues about Merlin's weapon in children's videos?"

"No that was just extra," Rodney waved his hand at him. He moved over next to Daniel and took his hand, "What we called you up here to tell you, is that me and Daniel have decided to get married!"

"What!" John and Cameron yelled at the same time.

Vala looked at Cameron, who was frowning at McKay, "I told you, you should have tried to play hard to get with him."

Elizabeth smiled, "Rodney! Congratulations! And Daniel I'm sorry happy for you as well. I thought you would never get over General O'Neill."

Daniel leaned in and kissed Rodney on the cheek, making the astrophysicist giggle, "Well when you loose you loose. Sam's better for him any way."

Carter blushed and smiled, "If I would have known about you and Jack, Daniel I would have never-"

"It's fine Sam! I have Rodney now. He's more my match than Jack any way."

John glared at them all, "What the hell is going on around here! First cartoons and then this!"

"Colonel Sheppard!" Elizabeth snapped at him, "Be nice!"

"Elizabeth," he begged with her, "you have to see that this is insane! McKay isn't even gay!"

"Bisexual actually," he looked Carter over for a second before looking back at John, "You know I tried to get your attention Colonel, but you hate me. That much is clear, since you tried to have Colonel Mitchell kill me!"

"I didn't want him to kill you!"

"You told me he was deathly allergic to citrus what did you expect me to do with that knowledge? He was after _my_ scientist."

"Not yours any more," Vala looked him over, "but you can have me instead! I'll even wear the glasses…"

"You didn't want me any more," Rodney turned and pressed himself into Daniel's chest, "you were trying to get rid of me."

Daniel hugged the astrophysicist to him, "And you talk about shooting him all the time. What kind of Colonel are you?"

"I want to go back to transfer back to Earth," Rodney said into Daniel's chest.

"Of course you can, right Dr. Weir?" Daniel asked sweetly.

Elizabeth was glaring at John, "We'll be sorry to loose you Rodney but now that I see what you've had to deal with, it's probably for the best. If I would have known this is how he treated his scientists I would have never brought him on this expedition."

"No!" John shouted, "I was joking! Rodney's my friend!"

"You looked serious to me," Cameron said, glaring him down.

"Get out of here Colonel," Elizabeth snapped. "You can stay in your room until SG-1 has left."

"No!" John yelled. He looked to Rodney, "McKay you have to stay here. You're part of my team!"

"Not any more," Daniel gave him a fierce look. "Cameron get him out of here."

"Sure thing," the colonel moved over toward John.

"Hey! If you haven't noticed this is a bad thing for you too!" Sheppard pointed at the couple.

"If being with McKay makes him happy, then I'm happy."

"Colonel I'm ordering you to go back to your room," Elizabeth moved toward him as well, followed by Carter.

"No!"

"Are you disobeying my orders again?" she looked livid.

"You're in _so_ much trouble," Vala said in a sing-song voice from across the room.

"Colonel…" Carter, Elizabeth and Cameron all stalked toward him pushing him back out the door. Daniel still had his eyes set on him but he stayed with Rodney, holding him to his chest.

"Colonel!" Carter shouted.

"I'm sorry! Rodney I mean it!" John yelled as the three pushed him out and the doors slammed shut in his face. He tried to open them with his gene but they wouldn't budge. He slammed his fist against the glass like part of the window.

"Colonel!" Elizabeth's voice snapped through the now closed doors to the briefing room.

"No…Rodney…"

"COLONEL SHEPPARD!"

John's head shot up from his pillow, breathing hard. He looked around and found himself in his room. He checked his watch and it was 45 minutes after Rodney had stormed off. He must have been dreaming…

"Colonel Sheppard, please respond!"

"Yeah…" he choked out after pushing on his ear piece. He rubbed over his eyes and face. Just a dream.

"Oh thank God. We thought something had happened to you," Elizabeth sounded relieved.

"Fell asleep I guess…sorry."

"Well when you're awake enough we need you in the briefing room. Daniel found something interesting."

John walked slowly into the room and it was just how he'd seen it in his dream. Daniel was standing at the head of the table and Carter and Cameron and Vala were there…and Rodney…Rodney was standing next to Daniel…

"Sheppard! Good you're here," Daniel waved a video tape in his hand at him and John froze.

"Before anyone says anything else I have to say something!" John said loudly.

Everyone turned and looked at him and John blushed slightly and looked right at Rodney.

"Look…I'm sorry about the lemon and…I do like you…a lot…and…" He looked over at Daniel whose eyebrows had disappeared under his hair, "And I'm happy for whatever you and Daniel have…and," He looked back at Rodney, "I'm sorry I didn't realize you were flirting with me, but I'm really….bad…at this stuff…so…"

As John trailed off he saw their bewildered shocked stares and Elizabeth had that look of talking down a mad man.

"…Good luck with the Sword in the Stone thing and oh if you want to transfer back to Earth it's fine Rodney. Zelenka will be…fine. With that said…I'll just…" and he turned around and bolted out of the room.

Cameron recovered first and looked at Dr. Weir, "Ok what in the hell was that?"

Daniel blinked, "Sword in the Stone thing?"

Carter looked at Rodney, "Did he just say you've been _flirting_ with him?"

Rodney shook his head in shock.

"He also said something about Rodney and Daniel?" Elizabeth's eyes moved to the linguist, who looked embarrassed.

"That might be my fault…"

"You told him we were involved!" Rodney shouted at Daniel, finally recovering.

"No I said, I thought the two of you were together when he came bolting out of his room after you. I told him to wait awhile before going after you because whenever Jack used to-"

"So now he thinks we're a couple!"

Daniel sighed, "He said something about knowing you better than I did and I might have said I wouldn't be so sure about that. I was strictly talking about civilian relations with their colonels."

"Like your relations with General O'Neill?" Rodney snapped.

Daniel glared at him and Carter lowered her head trying to hide a smile.

Cameron looked at between them, "Ok…this is something I _need_ to know."

Vala grinned at him, "Daniel and the General like have hot steamy se-"

The blue eyed linguist placed a hand over her mouth, blushing. "Remind me never to take her off world again!"

Vala made an outraged noise and bit into Daniel's hand.

"Ahh! You!" he couldn't even get the words to form so he just waved his slightly bleeding hand at her.

"The General," Carter said slowly not looking at anyone, "and Daniel, have been together for a long time Cam."

"And no one thought to tell me this why?" Cameron asked looking at Vala who had turned her head away from Daniel.

"Because maybe they didn't know how you'd feel about a member of your team being gay or the fact that you could out your boss and oh I don't know get him fired?" Rodney asked sarcastically.

Mitchell just glared at him, "You know I still have that lemon McKay."

Vala sighed, "You wouldn't have had to worry about him telling anyone. I mean obviously the good colonel here has been after Daniel since he was made leader of SG-1."

Daniel looked at her, "He has?" He looked up at Cameron who was now glaring at Vala, "You _have_?"

Elizabeth pinched the bridge of her nose, "Rodney, why don't you go down to Colonel Sheppard's quarters and-"

"Oh hell no. He just confessed he had a crush on me."

"McKay," Carter gave him a look, "I don't think you mind that."

"I'm not gay!"

She snorted, "Oh please. You only talked about him every few minutes while you were with us."

"I did n-" he swallowed nervously, "alright maybe I did."

"So?" she gave him a look.

"I can't just admit that!"

She stuck him with a harder look.

"To him!"

"Rodney," Elizabeth sighed, giving him her own stare.

"Fine Fine…I'm going."

John sat on the edge of his bed that was facing the wall, leaned up against his headboard. He had his pillow tucked under his chin, with his arms wrapped around it. He felt like an idiot for just spouting out that stuff and Rodney was probably even madder now than he had been in his dream.

At least he wouldn't have to see them holding hands. Or see Rodney give Daniel the flirty looks that had always been reserved for him.

"Thanks Jackson. That's just what I needed. You making me realize that I'm in love with my geek when you've already got him."

A flood of memories assaulted his mind. Throwing him off the balcony, Rodney saving Atlantis from the black energy monster. Him working on the puddle jumper when he had no idea what he was doing. Shooting at a wraith to save his life. Rodney boosting that John too had died in the Alternate Reality. Demanding to know why John had never told him he could have been in Mensa. Coming into the shared conscious on Aurora and commenting about his Rakish hair.

And there were so many, many more. He couldn't believe he hadn't noticed. Or maybe he had. That's why he knew all those times by heart.

Dream Cameron had been right though. Making Rodney happy, would make him happy, even if he'd regret it for the rest of his life.

He looked at his watch. A few more hours and SG-1 would be heading back. They'd all be gone.

There was a knock at his door and he sighed.

"Come back later unless it's an emergency."

There was silence and John relaxed. Then he heard a faint sigh and then the sounds of someone taking apart the controls on the outside of his door.

"Go away Rodney."

A few seconds later the door came open any way.

"I said you're off the team. What more do you want?"

The door closed and a few seconds later he felt the other side of his bed dip, "I'd like to my place on the team back."

"Too bad. You deserve to be with him and I'm not going to let you stay here and get killed."

Rodney sighed, "I'm not in a relationship with Dr. Jackson. He's in love with General O'Neill."

"Right…"

"Stop being stubborn! I'm not good at this either!"

John sighed.

"They said I uh…talk about you a lot…when you're not around."

"What?"

"Mitchell and Carter…they uh said that."

John felt the bed shift and a hand rested on his shoulder.

"And I do…talk about you a lot."

"So?"

"More than I talk about anyone else."

John snorted, "You work with me. You get that dreamy look in your eyes when you talk about other people."

"I probably also get it that 'dreamy' look in my eyes when I find a piece of amazing ancient technology too."

John smiled, "You do."

"Can't we just have sex?" Rodney groaned, lying down on the bed behind Sheppard.

The colonel choked on his air, "What!"

"I mean this is pointless. We could spend all night talking about the signs of why or why not I like you, but the fact is we're wasting valuable time that we could be having hot steamy sex."

"But-"

Rodney grabbed a fist full of John's black t-shirt and tugged him backwards so John was laying on his back over Rodney's chest, "Colonel haven't you learned not to argue with me yet?"

"No," but he didn't move.

"Good, because it's one of the things I love about you."

"Love?"

Rodney carded his hand through John's hair before fisting his hand and half sitting up and half dragging the colonel to him until their lips met. Catching John off guard with his forwardness, Rodney pushed his tongue into his mouth. Not being able to stop himself, John arched into the kiss and moaned, only to have his head yanked back.

"See what I mean about hot steamy sex?"

Glaring, John groaned, "That wasn't sex. That was a kiss."

"Are you in doubt of my sexual prowess Colonel?"

"You're a kinky bastard McKay."

Rodney growled and kissed him again but pulled away after a few seconds, "And why is that?"

"You are calling me 'Colonel' in bed."

Rodney grinned down at him, "Not only that…I'm dominating you while I do it…"

"So about this lemon?" Daniel asked Cameron while looking over the railing at the city.

Cameron laughed, "Sheppard gave it to me. Told me he was 'deathly allergic to citrus'. You've read the reports Sheppard's done on McKay right?"

"That he works best when his life is threatened?"

"Yeah…He was giving me the key to unlock the McKay genius."

"And you used it?"

"Of course. We didn't know about the wraith hive ship, so he didn't know his life was at risk. Carter was at her wit's end because he wasn't cooperating. So I shoved it in his face when he said his life wasn't in danger so he couldn't just come up with something, and told him not yet it wasn't."

Daniel laughed, "That's why he was coming out of Sheppard's room, looking ready to attack something."

"Yeah…This whole thing was my fault. I'd been rude to him before that so he thought I might actually do it."

"You wouldn't have," Daniel sounded sure.

"I don't know. McKay's a little-"

"Arrogant?"

"I was going to say annoying."

Daniel snorted, "Jack used to say that about me too."

"He probably still does," Cameron muttered.

"You're right," he smiled softly. "So about what Vala said."

Cameron raised his hands, "You're property of the General. I'll look some where else."

"But she was right?" Daniel asked looking over the tops of his glasses at him.

"Yeah."

"You know…" Daniel said turning back to look out over the city, "there was a reason why Jack picked you to lead SG-1 other than your background."

"Really?"

Daniel smiled and licked his lips, "He said something about my Air Force twin."

"He what?"

"He-"

"Thought I was hot and I 'pinged' on his radar and he sent you in on a covert mission to seduce me?"

"Are you seduced?"

"You had me seduced at 'Colonel'," Cameron smiled.

"At Colonel?"

"First word you ever said to me."

Daniel looked amazed, "You remembered that?"

Mitchell grinned, "What's the first thing Colonel O'Neill said to you?"

"My report said over 10,000," Daniel chuckled.

"Huh?"

"He was talking about the age of the cover stone we found over the Stargate."

"So does this mean in the future I could be gettin' lucky?"

Daniel smiled, "If you don't mind having threesomes. Jack gets-"

"Jealous easy and no…I don't think I'd mind that at all," Cameron laughed. "You know something?"

"What?"

"This all started with a lemon."

"You know what they say. When life gives you lemons-"

"Shove them in front of Dr. McKay's face and every thing'll come out right."


End file.
